What if you are dating a married man and he won't get his divorce?
Written by admin on April 17, 2009 – 4:06 pm -I am in a situation I should not be in. I started dating this guy a long time ago. He left his wife and moved in with his mom. We got serious and he later moved in with me. He tells me we are going to get married, but I don't know for sure if I want to anymore. It's going on 14 years now and nothing has changed. Should I get out now?
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Posted in Dating Married | 13 Comments »
By SAM on Apr 17, 2009 | Reply
That's the risk of dating a man who has not yet finalized his divorce. Unless the status quo has changed, his pattern of behavior will change.
If you are not happy with your current situation, an ultimatum is your only option.
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By Nobody's FooL on Apr 17, 2009 | Reply
Um, 14 years?!?
I would not wait a year for a man.
Married men rarely get divorced for their side piece. And if he does, more than likely he will play around on you as he did his last wife.
Kick him out and find a new SINGLE man.
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By Jc J on Apr 17, 2009 | Reply
lmao.. ur kidding right?
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By Gretchen on Apr 17, 2009 | Reply
I think you should have gotten out 14 years ago.
A guy who wants to marry you will marry you. There should be no more excuses at this point.
I'm sorry, but just being honest.
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By I'm On To You. on Apr 17, 2009 | Reply
No Offence, but you are just questioning it after 14 years ? Something wrong with this picture .
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By Kelly M on Apr 17, 2009 | Reply
Sorry to hear the situation you are in. Only you can answer that though. If you are doubting it, think it through. 14 years is a long time, and my opinion is if you can go through that then what could you go through in the future that you couldnt handle? Im sure you will be a great couple.
However, if you arent happy, then yes, you should. You shouldnt compramise your happiness. But, is it something that can be mended with time.
Sounds like you have some thinking to do.
Also, i have found through personal experience, talking to him may help you make your decision. Maybe he doesnt want to be together anymore either, maybe he was thinking you were frustrated and he knows how to make you happy, idk. I think its best not to assume men can read our minds cause its obvious to me they cant. Unless you got a good one.
Good Luck.
Also, to those who think that someone wont leave someone for their side piece, that isnt true. I was married and left him and i am still with my man. Not married to him yet, just need to feel single – not be it, but feel it for a while before getting married again.
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By Nancy M. on Apr 18, 2009 | Reply
If the man has not gotten a divorce after 14 years then there is no way that he ever will. He is only using you and you should not have stayed 14 years with a married man. If he has not changed by now then he never will. It is time for him to go. Find a man who is not married.
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By Pat G on Apr 18, 2009 | Reply
hummmm, you think?
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By AinePriestess on Apr 18, 2009 | Reply
You should have gotten out 14yrs ago. Face facts. He's not going to divorce his wife. You're being used. You are the whore on the side. Now have some pride and find your own man.
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By Chuck on Apr 18, 2009 | Reply
Not sure why anyone would not file for divorce after 14 years of living apart. Maybe it's in his head.
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By Gentle Fox on Apr 18, 2009 | Reply
Tell his wife over the phone and see if she pulls the phone out of the wall. Then the next time you see him and he's walking funny, ask him where she strategically place the phone. LMAO.
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By lorisam7879 on Apr 18, 2009 | Reply
Wow. I am surprised that you've waited 14 years and are not just wondering if its ever going to happen. You mean he's been married to this woman for the entire time you've been together?
Its up to you whether you should get out now, you've spent such a huge amount of your life with this man, this man that was never truly yours. He sounds like he's getting the best of two worlds – a wife and a girlfriend. If he hasn't divorced her yet, he probably never will.
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http://www.divorce4her.com/support.html
By Papa Bear on Apr 18, 2009 | Reply
Ten Stupid Things Women Do to Mess up Their Lives
http://search.barnesandnoble.com/Ten-Stupid-Things-Women-Do-to-Mess-up-Their-Lives/Dr-Laura-Schlessinger/e/9780060976491/?itm=3
References :